It's nice to see that Sakura Bunny has been taking over for me while I've been recovering. It's been kind of hard on me, but I've been thankful that both Korick and Sakura Bunny have been there to cuddle when I've had bad times. I haven't really been up for much of anything. I've re-centered though and am feeling more like myself and little.
It's been easier to deal with emotions since I got back to being my little self. I still amaze myself at how much easier it is to process things when I'm back in my little mindset. This experience has helped me see the difference between being myself and being the true 4 year old. I know Daddy tried really hard to be there, but I also know I did burn him out early on about the time I started going a bit manic and not sleeping. When I was in the hospital though and they where sticking needles in me and all of that. Shadow was right there when I cried for him and held my hand. Before he left for the night, he tucked Korick into bed with me and told me that he'd have his phone on if I needed him. Which of course I did... until about 2 am.
I've been scared to use my crayons and color books and to draw. My mom took and hid my sewing machine. I tried to sew once already and it didn't end well. The project turned out, but there was sobbing... a lot of it and pain. So, hiding with Korick has been what the agenda has been for the past few days since then.
Now, on to cupcake flavored goldfish crackers and cartoons.
No comments:
Post a Comment